ghoulsis | I hate telephones.

ghoulsis: Good afternoon, thank you for calling [Name of Stupid Job], this is

ghoulsis, may I help you?

Teh Boss: [noisy background noise, long pause] Hello, is this [Dayside Girl]?

ghoulsis: No, it's

ghoulsis. [Like I just told you, dipshit.]

Teh Boss: Oh. Have we had any call-ins from Reach magazine today?

ghoulsis: [checks log] No, sir.

Teh Boss: No?

ghoulsis: No.

Teh Boss: How about yesterday?

ghoulsis: [checks log again] One walk-in from Reach yesterday.

Teh Boss: One walk-in?

ghoulsis: [wondering if Boss is hearing-impaired, stupid, or has some kind of severe short-term memory impairment] Yes.

Teh Boss: Okay, thanks. [hangs up]

ghoulsis: [counts the hours until out of here]

Update: 3:00 pm.

ghoulsis: Good afternoon, thank you for calling [Name of Stupid Job], this is

ghoulsis, may I help you?

Guy: Hi, is Creepy Marketing Guy there?

ghoulsis: I'm sorry, but Creepy Marketing Guy is out of the office. I'll be happy to take your name and number, and have him give you a call back.

Guy: He's not in the office?

ghoulsis: [wondering if there's a hearing-loss epidemic in the City that she doesn't know about] No sir, he's out of the office.

Guy: You can't reach him at all?

ghoulsis: [No, that's not what I said at all.] Sir, I can reach him on his cell phone. I'll be happy to do so for you. [Of course, this requires that you, yanno, LEAVE ME A NAME AND NUMBER.]

Guy: Oh, well, Creepy Marketing Guy and I used to work together over at [Teh Home Office]. I was a consultant, and [blah blah blah] and I saw him the other day at [blah blah blah], so I thought we might get together on Monday for lunch!

ghoulsis: [feigns interest all this information] And your name is?

Guy: I'm [CMG's buddy], just ask him to call me about lunch on Monday. I'm at work, but that's okay, he can call my cell phone, it'll be okay, because [blah blah blah]...

ghoulsis: And what is your cell phone number, please?

Guy: Oh, it's [redacted].

ghoulsis: Thanks! I'll have him give you a call.

Guy: [hangs up]

ghoulsis: [wonders why no one ever says goodbye anymore]

Be honest, now... am I being unclear?

I hate telephones.

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